Matthew 13:12 “To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given, and they will have an abundance of knowledge.”
Have you ever had a “good” thing go bad? Leaving you confused, insecure, maybe even doubtful? That's the tricky thing about relationships. One moment everything can seem almost perfect.. There's an instant spark and attraction, there's chemistry, curiosity.. But eventually you come to this realization, that a good thing isn't always a God thing.
Jesus tells us in Matthew, that those who listen to his teaching, more understanding and abundance of knowledge will be given. Therefore it's up to us to apply this Holy Spirit wisdom, not only to our personal lives, but to our relational choices as well.
When it comes to picking a partner, there can seem to be a lot of “good” choices, but as a follower of Jesus, our standard shouldn't be to settle for just “good”, but for God’s best. We immediately have the opportunity to take on an upgrade, and should be looking for someone divinely suited for us.
Chemistry doesn't always align with Calling. Attraction shouldn't rob our Attention.
1 Corinthians 14:33
“For God is not a God of confusion but of peace.”
Some practical knowledge that I have learned through experience, and my walk with Jesus, is simple. God is a God of peace, not a God of confusion. Thankfully, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we as believers have the ability to know the difference between the world's “peace”, and the peace that Jesus freely offers us.
When picking a partner, it's necessary to choose someone who has similar vision, belief, values, and calling as you, but most importantly, receiving a full manifestation of God’s peace in your choice. I know firsthand what a relationship without the peace of God looks like. For example, it left me feeling constantly confused, insecure, shameful, and ultimately pulled me away from God, rather than push me more towards Him.
Soon after this relationship was over, I learned that just because it seemed like a good thing, and checked off most of my boxes, it wasn't a God thing, because his peace was never present.
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
When choosing a partner, or potentially entering into a new relationship a few significant things to take notice of are the following:
Does this person share your same values? It should be a non-negotiable that if you are in Christ, you are looking for someone who shares the same love and desire for Jesus. He is the Lord of your life, therefore, your relationship should glorify him, rather than satisfy yourself.
Is the peace of God present in your decision? Pray to the Lord, and invite him into your thought process. He wants only the best for you, and will make it clear whether this person aligns with his plans for you, or not.
Is this person pushing you towards Christ, or pulling you away? Relationships are profound, they are meant to sharpen us, and propel us to look more like Jesus. Take inventory of the fruit this relationship produces, and discern whether it adds to your life, or takes away.
And simply, is there genuine love and friendship? The best relationships are built on the foundation of a solid friendship. Do you enjoy eachothers company? Can you laugh with this person? Do you feel authentically yourself and comfortable to be you?
Genesis 26: 8
“When he had been there a long time, Abimelech king of the Philistines looked out of a window and saw Isaac laughing with Rebekah his wife.”