Unmarried at 29: How it's the best thing I couldn't have imagined‍

March 28, 2022
5 min read
Written By

Being single in your late twenties can feel very discouraging when you compare your life with what society says. But it can actually be the best season that God has for you.

I had everything planned out. I was supposed to graduate from college, get engaged when I was 26 years old and be married by 27 or 28 the latest.

I can imagine God smiling at me while I was laying  “my plan” in front of him and being like “oh my dear girl, you have no idea.”

My 28th birthday arrived and I was still single. I didn’t even have a boyfriend, just a history of bad relationships, one after the other, which came with a lot of heartbreak.

I would see my friends with their romantic relationships and some of them were already getting married, and it made me wonder if there was something wrong with me. Frustration, confusion and even loneliness filled my heart as time went by. 

My life wasn’t terrible though, I had a nice job, good friends, a lovely family and a great community at my church. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something missing.

I thought what I was missing was a partner. But in reality I was missing something greater than that, I just didn’t know it yet.

At some point in the following months to come, God started unsettling my heart, making me feel uncomfortable and awakening something in my spirit.

The adventure God had for me 

I had the opportunity to come visit Miami in June 2021 and I had the chance to come to Vous in person for the first time. I’ve been following the church for a few years and watched the sermons online and it had become one of the greatest influences in my faith.

I walked inside the church with my legs shaking and my heart pounding hard in my chest. “I feel like God is calling me to be here,” I told my sister, not being able to quite understand exactly what that meant.

When I came back home, my heart was restless, like I needed to do something about it, like God was urging me to move. So I went on to Vous’ website and found the different programs they have for College Students and decided to apply. 

A few days later, I was accepted into the Leadership Program. And before I knew it, I was already packing my bags to move to Miami. 

I went to see my counselor before I left and she said  “Remember when you were telling me how frustrated you were because you were not married yet? But you were actually not meant to be married by this time of your life. You were meant to be doing what you are about to do, which is moving to Miami and following what God is calling you to do.”

And then it hit me. If I would’ve been married, I probably would have never applied to the program. And looking back on everything I’ve lived by being here made me realize how much I would’ve missed if I hadn’t come. 

All the things I’ve learned, the friends I’ve made, the deeper relationship I’ve built with God. The new appreciation I have for my single life and how I’ve used it to grow closer to Him and build His kingdom.

Now I have a new thankfulness for God’s plans and timing and a gratitude for him not giving me what I wanted when I wanted it.

Just like Isaias 55:8-9 says, His plans are better than ours. And the plans He had for my life were definitely better than what I could’ve imagined.

I am 29 years old now, and I am so grateful that I haven’t gotten married yet and I am also thankful for the things that God has worked on in me and through me during this time. 

So I want to encourage you, if you feel frustrated by being single, or discouraged by anything that hasn't happened yet, trust God’s timing. You are not missing out on anything. If you are walking in God’s will and being obedient to His voice, then you are exactly where you are supposed to be.

Use this time to ask God how He wants to work in your life and be courageous enough to follow the things He's calling you to do during this season of your life.

If you want to learn more about how to live your single life to the fullest, I recommend you watch Single & Secure's series, by Pastor Rich Wilkerson Jr. I promise you, you won't regret it!

The VOUS Blog is a space for discovery with resources and reflections, curated by the VOUS community and team, to encourage you on the journey.

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